Families Are Totally Underrated

I come from a family of six. Nowadays people might say that's a big family but to be honest it felt like I was a family of one because of the way I grew up, being the youngest. 

Before I go any further, let me just first say I'm not blaming anyone in my family. I love them all, I do, but we were and are terrible communicators, in every aspect of the word. And second, this is all my own personal opinion.

So, family of one, you ask? Let me explain. Six years ago, I would have said I had a normal childhood. I played with neighborhood kids, I had to share a room with my sister, stuff like that. But now I say it was very dysfunctional. After the age of probably 11 I felt like I was on my own. That's when my oldest sister left for college. It's when I first got my own room. It must have been really exciting because that's pretty much where I spent the next 7 years, as my siblings, one by one, left for college. By the time I was 14, I was the only kid at home. Those are the times I remember most, which is super sad, because most of that was spent with my dog who, alas, cannot hold a conversation very well. In fact, I always wished for a younger sibling. I didn't exactly want to be alone but I was so used to it, I grew to prefer it. Even then, I can honestly say I'm closer to my three best friends than I am with any of my family. How sad is that?!

There are a lot of other factors and things that are missing from this picture but I would say most of our issues as a family stemmed from a lack affection and emotional connection. It really messes with you! Like, hugging is unnatural to me. I still have a hard time saying "I love you" to anyone because it was just implied in my family. There was just no need. But it makes a world of difference between an implication and saying/showing it. My family is working on these things, and that's all due to a family tragedy that forced us to change. There is just so much I wish we did differently and I'm not saying we can't improve, but I just wish as a child I could have felt those things more and learned to have better relationships within my family.

Since I'm having all of these realizations and epiphanies about family it makes me super sad when we see that people are having less children. I'm lucky I had the opportunity to grow up with other kids but I still missed out! I can easily imagine the life of a child with one or no siblings. It's no fun! They might  get spoiled (which I can also relate to. My siblings can attest to it) but there's no replacement for the scrap books, home videos, or inside jokes.

Just the idea of family has evolved, and I feel sorry for the next generations that won't be able to experience family reunions with cousins at Grandma's house where you could play monster under the stairs. The love from one mom and one dad, who they can say with certainty loved each other. An older sibling babysitting and locking the younger ones outside or threatening to throw them in the oven (it's funny later, I promise).

There are so many joys to a traditional big family but everyone has freedom to choose. If you believe it's not for you, no disrespect, but just know you're missing out on so much.